Holy Crap!! (aka Prayer???)

What the????

Okay - I'm trying to be "interest catching" and controversial with that title...  I don't necessarily find the idea of prayer completely synonymous with "Holy Crap" - but often I think it is.  And, a bit of honesty (that may prompt knowing grins from my atheist friends, and exclamations along the lines of "aha!  I KNEW it!!" from some of my Christian friends...  )  At this point in my spiritual journey - I kinda...don't... pray.  I just don't.

Against such things...

Recently I've been involved in some online discussions regarding the issue of same-sex marriage.  In the first, I posted what I thought was a fairly innocuous comment on facebook, in support of marriage equality.  The reaction was... astounding!!  I was quite unprepared for the level of vitriol - and the most vitriolic responses invoked "God" as their justification.  Ouch!!

Jesus as Performance Artist...???

Image Credit:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/artanddesign/2010/oct/03/interview-marina-abramovic-performance-artist

Yes.  I know - this sounds kinda weird...  but I have been switched on to performance art, recently, after viewing a performance by Marina Abramovic, and learning more about her solo work, as well as her collaborations with German artist, Ulay.

Performance art is something I have never previously understood.  My first experience of it was when a friend and I visited the NSW Art Gallery, and attended a performance art event that just happened to be on.  I think we were all of 18 or 19 years old at the time.  We didn't know what to make of the bizarre behaviour of the performer.  It was confronting, to say the least!  Over the years I have seen occasional performance art pieces, but did not find the artform accessible.  The piece by Abramovic, linked to above, moved me to tears - in fact, I was a wreck!  I shared it with a good friend, and she had the same reaction.  Powerful stuff!

My Big, Fat Jesus Post!

http://awayfindersgarden.files.wordpress.com/2012/11/beauty-or-ugliness.jpg

Although it has meandered quite a lot, I think this "series" started out as an attempt to clarify why, although I am not enamoured with institutional Christianity, I still follow Jesus.  Basically, it is because I see in Him the fulfilment of all that I see as real spirituality, and the antidote to religion.  Ironic, huh, that so much religion has grown up surrounding his name!?

Many (perhaps most?) people who are familiar with the Jesus story, see it as a call to live according to Christian "law",  perhaps a declaration that there is only one way; that being the Judeo-Christian cultural tradition, a denouncement of sin (because of course, that is how we got into this mess - all our fault!), a demand to ascribe to a particular set of "righteous" behaviours, and a requirement to join and belong to the "right" group.  The reward for all this, is that you get to go to Heaven, rather than Hell (where all the non-believers end up) after you die, and an implied assumption that "spiritual" and "holy" are something quite apart from this tainted, earthly life.

The thing is, when you do see it that way, the person of Jesus actually becomes very difficult to reconcile with it.  His behaviour and sayings become problematic and contradictory...  because they really don't fit in with that view!

My List

I do love scribbly gums...  Seemed a nice way to make an image of my "list"

Well, I promised in THIS post, that I would come back and add my own "list" of stuff that has seemed to me, to show a glimmer of the ultimate...  If you've just stumbled into the conversation, we've been tossing around ideas on what "authentic spirituality" might be.  (Seems that's a question I ask a lot!).

Some of my wonderful blogging friends added their thoughts to the previous post, and ideas included intuitions of "something more", of connectedness to something greater, and ideals beyond physically tangible reality.  I can relate very much to all of those.  Here is my little list of the kinds of things in my own life that have seemed to touch on something "deeper":

• Profound family moments...  the birth of a baby is one example that is clear in my mind.  After my daughter, Hannah, was born I remember watching her asleep and feeling absolutely awed by both the presence, and the profound significance of this tiny person.  A whole personality, a whole life, a whole impact on the world around her yet to come...
  
  There's also just "something" about knowing someone closely enough to really glimpse the infinity within them - & I guess family, and those friends who are family too, is where that happens best.

Um... Hello??? (And launching right back in... Belief... and stuff!)

It's been so long, I'd almost forgotten what my blog looks like!  Anyone still out there??

Sorry for the long silence. Life has been a bit overwhelming over the last couple of months...  but I think I'm back!! :D

AND... I'm still trying to figure out how to write my "Big, Fat, Jesus Post".  Here is Attempt Mark II.

(If you missed it, and are interested; Attempt Mark I is HERE.  )

I think, perhaps, the best way to begin explaining where I think Jesus fits into the whole cosmic picture, is to talk about what authentic spirituality may or may not be...  because I believe that is what he embodies.  I know that's a BIG statement - but let's start a little smaller - and as always, please add your thoughts to the discussion too!

Image credit:  http://library.sasaustin.org/questioning.php

So what is "spirituality"?  Seems to me it is an active desire to find and understand both "ultimate reality", and "a better way".  For many people (myself included) this amounts to some kind of "search for God".  However I know many atheists who would also consider themselves spiritual by this definition - and I agree with them.

Things I DON'T believe in.

I seem to be suffering from an ongoing case of "blogger's block" of late...  I think it is mostly due to the business of life;  work has been FULL on, lately, and (lucky me) the only times it hasn't been, I've fallen victim to the flu or some other rotten nasty bug (would you believe I and number one son are off to the doctor today, both with tonsillitis!), so a lot of things have been "on hold" for the last little while.

Percolating in the background, however, has been a desire to write a post about where I think the person of Jesus (you know, "Christ", "of Nazareth"... THAT Jesus!) fits into my thinking about life, faith, the universe, etc.  Part of my blogger's block, if I'm honest - is the fact that I find this confronting in a lot of ways.  It is a challenging post for me to write, and confronts not only what I believe, but how I live my life.  I know that I don't embody what I believe to be truth, anywhere NEAR enough.  And I think that's what it's all about - so to write about it is... confronting for me.

Anyway, enough of that.  I am going to ease myself into this via the "path of least resistance".  Today's post is not about what I believe at all - but what I definitely DON'T.  In a sense, it is far easier to be negative about religion and what is wrong with the world, than to BE the solution - but it is also useful to clarify where you are NOT, in order to see where you ARE (if that makes sense), so at the risk of sounding a bit negative, this is where I'm starting.  Bear with me!

Subverting our Stories...

Image Credit:  http://www.flickr.com/photos/harisroussos/6841284929/

Alright.  Here's my latest "niggle".  What is unique about Jesus?  It's one of those hard questions that can't be answered glibly.  I grew up steeped in the tradition that says Jesus was, in fact, God incarnate.  And that he was the only incarnation of the one true God, to visit us in this way.  That's a very. big. claim.

So, if Jesus was the only human incarnation of the Creator God of the cosmos;  what would he be like?  What would be unique about him?  It seems to me that if the crucifixion of Christ is, indeed, the pivotal point of human history - then there has to be a whole lot more to it, than a substitutionary sacrifice to fulfil the demands of a religion - ANY religion.  That's just not big enough.

Now some of my Christian friends reading this will think I've finally lost the plot and fallen into heresy - and my atheist friends will be cheering because I've finally "seen the light" and abandoned my faith - but settle down, peeps - this is neither.

Typology

Image Credit:  http://www.streetandstage.com/jesus-christ-pose/

Now there's a word!!


My dad was a bit of a theologian, and so I grew up with a bit of theological language in the atmosphere.  A "type" in theology-speak is something that creates a picture for us.  Usually it is used in the phrase "a type of Christ", meaning "a picture of what Christ is like".  Some of the "types" I remember learning about were as varied as the rock that Moses hit in the desert (Moses hit the rock and then water came out), the snake on a stick that healed people (yes - that's really in there!) Melchizedeck  (the priest from nobody-knows-where who came and talked with Abraham), the luckless sheep that got sacrificed instead of Isaac, and of course LOTS of the Jewish laws, ceremonies and rituals.  


I'm a little hazy on the details now... those conversations were a long time ago, and in any case I'm sure there are varied opinions about them all.  However I love that concept of a "picture", rather than an explanation.   


So it got me thinking, what are some modern "types" that speak to me of Christ-ness?

What's the REAL point???

I woke up yesterday morning with a very CLEAR idea of what I was gonna post on the blog... then the day got busy, I didn't do it, and now I'm not quite sure where I was headed.  Don't you hate that??

So... I'm going to put some of my fuddled thoughts out there - but then YOU're gonna help me (Pleeease?  It'll be SO MUCH better if you do!)

It started with a couple of online discussions I've either been involved in or privy to.  Theological stuff  (don't run away now).  One involved the issue of homosexual marriage - a hot topic in Aust. right now (& if you are connected with me on facebook, you no doubt saw the heated debate that went on!)  A couple of others involved "churchy" type discussions about...  well, it doesn't really even matter what they were about...  MY frustration is about the approach we tend to take, to all this stuff.  (& don't tune out if you're not a "churchy" type - I'm talking about people in general).

The thing is, in ALL of these conversations, there was a lot of nitty-gritty, intense discussion, about whether things were, or were being done, or being thought of, the "right" way.  Whether someone's behaviour or views were "correct", or not. 

Well I have some thoughts about that.  For starters, when the conversation heads that way, I tend to back out.  Fast.  I think at that point, all is lost. 

Good Friday rest from the 'Rest-Fest'

Well, today is that day known (in the western world, at least) as "Good Friday".   For my family, it means the start of the Easter school holidays, and a welcome slowdown, for a little while.

Josh's "Part 2" on Biblical rest was tentatively planned for today, but we'd both forgotten this would be Easter weekend.  I think I'll give him the day off ;)

So...  back to "Good Friday".  Not being one to really make much of special days (of any sort) I wasn't planning to do anything in particular.  I did buy some hot cross buns as a sort of afterthought, yesterday at the supermarket.  (my kids do love them - and it makes a holiday seem more like a holiday if you mark it with something special)

As far as the so-called "Christian Calendar" goes, though, I have mixed feelings about Easter (and all the other "holy days", for that matter).

Hiding behind belief?

Untitled - By Me.

Ever become aware of a "story" that you've been telling yourself?  A convenient fiction that you habitually use, because it's easier and more comfortable than really engaging with the truth?

We all do it.

It starts when we're kids.  'Oh, he's just a "boy's boy"!'  (he's really rough and aggressive but that's okay)

"She's such a little princess!"  (she's spoiled and self-centred, but we'll humour her)

Sometimes these stories remain unchallenged into adulthood.  But even if they don't, we will go on to make up new and better fictions. 

One of mine is  (now shhh... don't tell ;)  "Oh I'm just very open and social".  Well, I am.  But that blithe pronouncement is something I have used, at times, to avoid more honest examination, of my interactions with people.  It can be a little mental censor's board that I hold up;  shielding me from the fact that I'm... maybe...  letting my own neediness show...  or what's infinitely worse, toying with the vulnerability of another. 

More than Listening

 

I had planned to write about something else today, but there's a conundrum gnawing at my brain, and it won't let me go until I tussle with it, so here goes...

This week, I posted videos by two quite different thinkers, Peter Rollins and Alain de Botton.  Rollins is a Christian theologian.  De Botton is an Atheist philosopher.  In spite of this, the two have something in common.  I think the "something" is listening (which was also the something I had planned to write about today).  They are both men who are prepared to listen, and, even more than listening, to actually evaluate their own beliefs and behaviour through the perspective of the "other". 

So you might expect their perspectives to mesh, quite nicely;  but whilst there are some points of agreement (the importance of listening being the biggest) their perspectives do. not. sit. comfortably. together. at. all.

And for me, the thing I find utterly compelling when I listen to both is NOT their agreement, but the jagged dissonance that exists between them. 

On Blog Stats

The other day I posted on facebook, that my blog had reached 4, 444 pageviews.

It just seemed kind of an awesome number!  Four fours aside, have THAT many people really looked at my blog???

In actual fact, it has taken over two years to reach that figure, and quite a large number of those hits were just me... checking on comments, obsessing about whether I'd said things "right".  This blog is not big.  But, like any writer, I get an amazing sense of fulfillment and satisfaction when people actually read my stuff.

Of course, in response to my little bit of self-indulgent crowing, the pageviews have dropped this week (yes, I do obsess a bit over them - I know it's silly!) and there were fewer comments (just so you know, I LOVE comments :)

But that got me thinking.

I don't think I've ever really expected my blog to get "BIG".  Some of the blogs I follow have comment threads so long that it takes half the day just to read through all the responses.  There are times when it just becomes a bunch of loudmouthed religious people crapping on, but for the most part, there is real dialogue and a sense of community - people listening to others and valuing their thoughts.  I love that!

But quite apart from the fact that I don't have any recognisable credentials at all, to be talking about this stuff (well, apart from the fact that I'm me, and this is more or less about my own ruminations) I think there's a very real reason, why the blogosphere is probably never going to start flocking here en masse.

A Modern Parable

The Big theme for me this week, is over and over, the need to identify with those "outside".  AND, I just discovered Peter Rollins.  His name seems to bounce around the blogosphere a bit - but until now I'd never heard him speak or read any of his stuff.  I think that's gonna change!

Enough from me - have a listen to this parable.  How does it sit with you?  I'd love to hear your thoughts!

Why Jesus makes NO sense!!

I visited my mum's church, a few weeks back.  I'm pretty uncomfortable with institutional church on the whole,  but this is one little community I think I could happily be a part of.   I have had a few contacts with them over the past few years, all of them positive.  The most significant was 2 years ago, when they mourned, with us, the death of my father.  So I guess that kinda makes them "extended family".  Their youth pastor, a guy named Joel Noonan (according to their website - I had not actually met him before) talked about Jesus' explanations of "The Kingdom of God" - and how totally confusing they can seem.  It's like a mustard seed, it's like a coin... it's like a farmer sowing seed...  Well, what is it, really??

He wryly recounted his visit to some church conference or other, where the visiting speaker had announced that he was going to explain very simply what the Kingdom of God meant - and then proceeded to list 47 different points intended to "simplify" our understanding (well, maybe not quite 47, but you get the idea) leaving his audience probably feeling more confused than ever before.

The Furore (about Mars Hill and "that" viral video)

Seems my ruminations on control in relationships were quite timely.  A couple of things seem to have really stirred up the blogosphere this week, and in my mind they both relate.

Since the blogosphere is largely American, and the fuss may not have filtered through to all my Aussie readers ...  I will briefly repeat what is now "old news".  A large and influential mega-church in the States has come under fire for the abusive use of "church discipline" towards one of its members.  At the same time, a video has gone viral, in which a young man explains passionately in poetry why he loves Jesus, but hates "religion".

The whole story on the church abuse thing is very well documented here, and the viral video can be found here.  (And thank you, Winn Collier, whose thoughtful post first got me involved in this conversation)

The church abuse story, to me, just smacks of everything that is wrong with "religion".  Rules over people, control, judgment, blind adherence to some kind of "formula" at the expense of human lives.  And following Jesus, and avoiding "religion" has been a bit of a mantra of mine, for some time now.  Yet Jeff Bethke's video sat uneasily with me.

Why Heady Brew?

Setting up this blog is a spur-of-the-moment decision, that has been a long time coming!

Previously, when I toyed with the idea of starting my own blog, I tried to think of a name that would capture the essence of what I'm mostly on about - authentic spirituality - as opposed to "religion" of any sort. As you'll probably pick up as this develops (& if you read on), I'm an imperfect & often stumbling follower of Jesus - but don't jump to any conclusions about that! I am completely convinced that Jesus' whole purpose was to liberate us from "religion" & allow us to relate honestly and freely with God - without having to jump through any special hoops!

Back to the blog name, then - Jesus had something to say about "New wine" not being contained in old wineskins. In other words - a new way that is too explosively vibrant to be contained in any traditions, just as new wine expands and bursts old wineskins. New wine seemed to be the concept I was after - but if you have any christian religious background at all - you'll know it's an overused (& often misused) cliche. & since it's about my own personal headspace as well (a crazy place to be, at times!) "Heady Brew" seemed to fit nicely. Hope it lives up to the label!