Thursday, March 11, 2010

Dying.

Woke up with a revelatory thought, the other morning - a real "WOW" moment!!

But to explain it, I think I need to give some background.

There have been some points in my life, where I have "given up" something, feeling it was a difficult sacrifice - only to find that as I let go of whatever it was, I found myself in an amazing new place, wondering why I had never let go before. The most recent of these was a bit of a turning point in my
marriage (which I wrote about in "love, Actually" a couple of posts back). I guess what I "let go of" at that time, was the right to set conditions on love. I thought they were important (I will love you only if you treat me right; only if we genuinely connect) but letting go of them and deciding to love, regardless, has opened my eyes to a whole new universe!! I will get off track if I go on about it too much - but it's as if those "conditions" that I thought were so essential, were the very things stopping me from really loving, and even from perceiving the love that was around me all along.

Anyway, back to the idea of "letting go". There have been other times in my life, too, where I've let go of something I thought was essential; let it "die", if you will - & found freedom and life in its place. Jesus talked about this a bit. "unless a grain of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it cannot bear fruit", and "whoever keeps his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it". I've been dwelling on this kind of idea a bit, lately.

Anyway, that's the background. The "WOW" moment happened in the early, half-awake moments of Tuesday morning. I guess I'm still reveling a bit in the new freedom of this whole unconditional love thing, & some thoughts about letting go, finding freedom, etc. etc. were rolling around in my head - then it hit me! I think that's what actual, physical dying is like. We let go of this life, and step into so much more!! Not only that, but if we have lived this kind of "God life" - letting go of the stuff that holds us back, and stepping into new realities - it isn't even something strange and unfamiliar! We've done it before!!

For those who do not already know, my beautiful Dad passed away on January 30th. His passing was peaceful - he was ready. I had the privilege of being with him, and watching him "let go" as he stepped into his next wonderful reality. Of course, I won't see that reality until I let go of my physical life too - & there are plenty of new adventures for me between now and that day - but you know what? I think I will be ready!

4 comments:

  1. Hey Kerry, am I the FIRST?!?!?!
    WOO HOO!!!!!

    Seriously though, I totally agree with what you said in this post. i think death is the 'great divide' that strikes fear into the hearts of many, but when we let go to this life, God takes us into something so much greater.

    In fact, if we live as Christ lived (and as Paul preached), we would 'die' to ourselves even while we live, and offer our bodies (and our lives) as sacrifices pleasing to God. If we live this way, when we finally reach the actual 'divide' between this earthly life and our eternal dwelling place, it will be a sweet experience, as we enter into our eternal reward!!!

    Part of me is naturally nervous about that day, when it does come. But a big part of me is really excited too. The song, "i can only imagine" by MercyMe comes to mind...

    Anyway, thanks for the thoughts.

    Dave Keane

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  2. Hey Dave! Yes - You ARE the first!!!

    As I was writing the blog post, the phrase that Paul uses "I die daily" came to mind. I used to read that with an internal "groan"! He talks about so much hardship and sacrifice that it has always sounded like teeth-gritting, hard discipline to me! Now I am seeing it in an entirely different way.

    Every little "death" I have died has taken me in some way, into God's Kingdom - and it is fantastic!!! If that's what Paul is talking about - I'm in!!!!

    Thanks for adding your bit!
    (& we like MercyMe in this household, too :D )

    Blessya!
    K

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  3. Hello all Kerry's friends. We are such a lucky lot of people to know Kerry. I am using the name of "Shy One" as I find that I am shy, and it surprises me a little (a bit of self discovery here).
    I also am a budding author, but far more recently than Kerry who has made notes for her book. I do not have my plot sorted out, though I have written probably tens of thousands of words in tenuously connected blocks, just because I enjoy writing and every one has to start somewhere. Even the most published authors probably began with rubbish like mine, and like me, they probably thought it was great stuff, for if they didn't, they would never have improved enough to be published!
    Do many of you follow any blogs and do you have tips for what to write? All I ask is, please, don't be shy...

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  4. Hello "Shy One"! Thanks for popping in :) I think you've written a whole lot more than me!! Maybe you should consider setting up a blog just for some of your musings and writings?

    One of my friends has done this, & it is a great read! Here's her web address, if you wanted to have a look: http://hannah-watts.blogspot.com/

    I was Hannah's school teacher at one stage - although I can't claim any credit for her amazing writing talent! I still get a warm fuzzy glow when I read her wonderful stories, though!

    xx
    Kerry

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Feel free to leave comments - I love discussion, & diverse opinions! So comment, add your own thoughts, disagree - you are welcome.

Its okay to comment anonymously if you are shy, but I'd much rather know who you are, & always appreciate it when people "own" their own opinions. Look forward to chatting with you :)